Building Trust or Walls?
Dear CEOs, founders, and leaders,
Do you realize just how amazing you are? The unique perspective, talent, and know-how you bring to your business are what make your success possible.
And, I invite you to pause for a moment and be truly honest with yourself.
Let’s engage in some introspection—with curiosity, and without blame.
Have you ever noticed feeling frustrated with someone on your team who isn’t stepping up or following through as they promised?
Do you ever feel anxious when there’s a lot riding on closing a sale or ensuring a client’s success?
Do you sense that your team could work better together—and wish things were different?
These questions stem from observing thousands of leaders who struggle to achieve different results.
When we encounter outcomes we don’t want, we tend to become frustrated, sad, anxious, or fearful. This is NORMAL.
We then look outside of ourselves, hoping something will change to bring us peace and trust.
We might wish for a partner, a child, or a teammate to change, believing it will bring us the peace we seek.
In the workplace, I’ve often seen CEOs with a clear vision for where they want their company to be, yet they struggle to reach it. Strife and drama can keep them stuck.
And, dare I say, this lack of progress often starts at the top.
What we say we want doesn’t always match what we have. This is unintentional, of course. Our brains are wired to keep us where we are—unless we learn to rewire our thinking.
A present, self-aware leader examines where they may not have been clear, where they’ve taken on more responsibility than necessary, and where they’ve stepped into someone else’s lane. This can lead to a downward spiral of trust. By taking over, we unintentionally send the message, “I don’t trust you to do your job, so I’ll do it for you.” This can lead others to feel, “I’m not good enough,” or “Why bother? You’ll just do it anyway.”
But this isn’t what you want to create with your team. You want them to know you trust them and for them to truly excel in their roles. However, what you say you want and what you actually have can be two very different things.
Do you know how you unintentionally created this lack of trust? And more importantly, do you know how to shift your outcomes?
You might not even realize it’s a trust issue.
How can you tell when trust is lacking?
There’s drama within your teams
There’s gossip
People aren’t stepping up and following through on their commitments
You keep getting the results you don’t want, even when you work harder
You and your team might feel frustrated, overwhelmed, disappointed, or anxious.
You may believe there’s not enough time, money, talent, engagement, or clients.
So, where does trust come from?
Hint: Time doesn’t create trust. Trust comes from being authentic with yourself and your people. It involves sharing your thoughts, feelings, and desires clearly and concretely, with actionable steps that everyone agrees to—not out of fear, but because they’re excited and feel part of creating an outcome.
✨Trust allows people to be themselves and ask questions out of curiosity rather than trying to assign blame.
✨Trust creates clear and impeccable agreements, free from control and defense.
✨Trust invites compassion and understanding when misalignment occurs.
✨Trust is knowing oneself, one’s purpose, and one’s role.
✨Trust is greater than oneself and one believes in a loving universe that holds us all.
✨Trust believes in the possibility of amazing outcomes from many different ideas.
✨Trust is present.
✨Trust cleans up broken agreements and fosters healing conversations rooted in learning.
✨Trust builds from emotional intelligence rather than from behaviors triggered by fear.
✨Trust requires slowing down in decision-making and observing oneself to take responsibility.
✨Trust is being willing to try new paths.
✨Trust is believing that everyone shares the same goal of peace and joy.
✨Trust is breaking away from the unconscious, defensive mind and returning to the power of curiosity.
✨Trust asks how the opposite of your belief could be true or even truer.
✨Trust is the only way to achieve sustainable, thriving teams, a growing clientele, and increased revenue.
Building trust is a practice. It starts with knowing yourself and recognizing where you’re creating a lack of trust stemming from your unconscious, fearful, controlling mind. This is where our minds are for all of us 96 to 98% of the time. Learning how to shift out of this limiting mindset will change your relationship with yourself and those in your world.
If you haven’t yet gained these tools, reach out to me to explore where you believe there’s a lack of trust with someone in your organization. Let’s implement a new tool that you can start practicing right away.
Become a thriving, trusting, compassionate, authentic, and curious leader! This is a moment-by-moment practice, and it’s the most important process for you to master.
Having worked with teams across the world, I already know the issues that keep them from growing. It’s always human. You are no different from me or anyone else. I encourage you to take a moment and read what these teams are saying about their work with me.
So, if you’re not getting the results you want, reach out to me. Don’t continue to waste your energy and time by doing the same thing over and over again. Change is scary. The mind doesn’t want to take the time to look at itself. It will tell you that you can’t stop and reflect. It will tell you to just do more of what you were doing, and eventually, it will work. But we must get really uncomfortable for change to happen.
Meet the fearful part of you with compassion. When you practice this, you’ll also have compassion for those on your team who are fearful, frustrated, or disappointed.
Learning human capital tools is truly the foundation for building trust and well-being.
See what others have said about working with me.
Sign up here and now for a 45-minute discovery call. Are you brave enough to see yourself? It does require courage! But I know you have that inside of you. Let’s access that now.
Xxoo,
Debra
